Pathway to Japanese Literature

Act I

On a small elevated sand dune that overlooked the calm sea

Around sunset

The man and the woman sat facing away from each other, their legs stretched out.
"The distance between 'mere comrades' had to be subtly maintained."

For a considerable while.

Man: “Ugh...”
“I want to eat peanuts.”

Woman: “Peanuts…? Instead of that, look over there—the mist is creeping closer.”

Man: “The mist isn’t poisonous…is it?” This won’t do—my butt’s freezing. I’d been digging in the sand without realizing it.

“Let’s stay here until the lighthouse lights up, shall we?”

Man: "Of course I'm not saying I want to leave either. Today feels strangely momentous somehow. I have this unease in my chest."

Woman: "I don't know why, but my throat's gone dry."
(suddenly starts singing)

At the bottom of the waves

A voice calls out—
If it be not I,
Who will answer?

Man: (In response, pretends to call out in a sing-song manner)

Heeey!

Heeey!

For a considerable while.

Woman: (Laughed brightly)

Man: “Why is it that female friends so oddly evade others, I wonder.”

Woman: "It’s because male friends, you see, oddly want to tag along everywhere."

“That isn’t something directed at me, surely. I’ve never tried to approach you outside the times or places you set.”

"That’s beside the point."

"Have I ever once touched upon an issue you avoid?"

“That doesn’t seem to be the case, does it?”

“Look at that.”
“But you—you too—you’re constantly trying to probe what others are thinking, aren’t you?”

Man: “That’s a rather unexpected observation. Without attempting to know what the other is thinking, can people face each other directly even for a moment?”

"Isn't that how it is? If only you'd abandon all these pretenses..."

“And if one doesn’t even fear making others uncomfortable…”

“Oh? So you actually possess such consideration?”
“I thought you were deliberately trying to provoke people…”

“Moreover, it appears there’s an aspect of you that fundamentally can’t feel anger.”

“Well, let’s settle it at that.”
(pause) “But didn’t you ultimately make Shinako-san angry after all?”

“That was her fault.”
“She asked me to let her hold my hand while swimming, so I was holding hers as she swam.”
“Then suddenly she complained about how I was gripping her hand.”
“She said, ‘That’s not how you do it!’”

Woman: “Oh dear...”
Man: “So I said, ‘Then do as you please,’ and let go of her hand.”
“Then...”
Woman: “Enough... Enough of this talk...”
Man: “So she ended up swallowing some water.”
“That’s what ended our friendship.”
Woman: “You could stand to be a bit more generous, couldn’t you...”
Man: “Is that what this is about?”

“When men and women become friends, one can’t muster much interest in such things.”
“I don’t know…
“I don’t see it that way.”
“Friends as friends, lovers as lovers, spouses as spouses—I want clear distinctions maintained.”

“Why must we make distinctions?”
“Let those who want distinctions make them.”
“If you and I decide we don’t want to become more than friends, we simply won’t.”

Man: “Of course, I’m making that effort too.”

Woman: “You needn’t make any effort.”
“Someone like you lacks passion as a lover and stability as a husband…”

Man: “Meaning you can only respect me as a friend?”
“How discerning of you.”
“That’s exactly why I feel safe sitting face-to-face like this—with you alone.”
“In matters of love, even if one side stays steadfast, it’s all for nothing.”
“On that count, you’re not the only steady one here.”
“I’m perfectly steady myself.”
“Because a woman like you would be capricious as a lover…”

“As a wife—selfish… Well, don’t you agree?”

(Laughing) “And as a friend, you’re truly impeccable. Unpretentious, sensitive, and considerate—at least among all the men and women I’ve ever associated with, there hasn’t been a single friend like you. This one thing I can state plainly before you—without flattery.”

“Let’s quit getting serious.”

“It’s because you’re listening so earnestly that this won’t do.”

“You’re being strange today.”
“Try speaking more calmly.”
“When we talk together like this daily, we must understand exactly what interests us about each other…”

Man…………….

“It’s okay, you know.”
“There’s no need to make that face…”
“If I were to say what I like about you… No—if I were to say what I seek from you—it’s that… refusal to regard women as women at all…”
“Oh, but it’s true….”
“Of course, there’s a bit of exaggeration, but that can’t be helped.”
“Because that’s where your religion lies…”

(Man: …?)

“To some people, that might seem contrived or even pretentious, but I like having male friends like that.” (Pause) “Oh well—I suppose it’s fine to say I like them.”

Man: If our discussion had reached this point, I supposed I ought to say it.
"I had always believed there was nothing more banal than these so-called friendships between sexes—those mere waystations in romantic pursuits."
"So I wished—somehow—to forget I was male and you female, yet still share that... intimacy—if I may call it that—a particular closeness only possible between man and woman. Through this, I hoped we might continually renew our lives."

“I don’t place much expectation in friends of the opposite sex.”
“What keeps life fresh is new romance—that’s what I believe.”
“However, a man who can’t love—if such a man exists—and if one were friends with such a male, well, that would be interesting to that extent.”
“However, I don’t consider you one of those men who can’t love.”

“That’s… well, beside the point.”
“This conversation has gotten rather tangled.”

Woman: (Laughs) “No need to fluster yourself.”
“Just say what you’re thinking.”
“You must be getting sick of me by now.”
“Even as a friend, I’m still inadequate—is that it?”
“Though I suppose…”

Man: “That’s not entirely accurate.”
“To put it plainly—you’re somewhat too beautiful to be a friend.”
“Which means I too have vulnerabilities… Perhaps we should simply shake hands here.”

“Go on, then.” (Extends her hand) “If you can shake it, go ahead—see what happens.”

(Awkwardly laughing) “I detest adventure.”

“As if you do…”
“From where I stand—your whole life’s another sort of adventure.”

“What about your life?”
“That’s precisely why I style myself an adventurer.”
“I suppose so.”
“You have this way of making adventure cautious.”

Man…….

Woman: “Keeping a housekeeper while remaining single—that’s another example of it.”

Man: (Laughs) “I see. So being single counts as an adventure.”

Woman: “At your age.”

Man: “Then marriage must remain an adventure too.”

Woman: “Once suffices—but then…”

Man: “If once doesn’t suffice…”

Woman: “It would simply stop being an adventure.”

Man: “How blasé of you.”
“In any case, I detest adventure.”
“If my singlehood must be labeled an adventure, so be it—but at least I conscientiously avoid exploiting it.”
“Your liberated way of thinking intrigues me, but rest assured I maintain rather steadfast convictions myself.”
“I’ve resolved to spurn outright any temptation that might unsettle my mind or encumber my life.”
“Even this association with you—it wasn’t something I pursued from my side, you realize.”

Woman: “Yes—it was I who asked Shinako-san to introduce us.”

Man: “That Shinako-san is merely a friend’s sister—nothing more…”

Woman: “You’d call it nothing. There’s no need to refuse like that. So—are you ordering me about? Telling me we should sever ties again?”

“That might be acceptable.”
“However, at present, there doesn’t seem to be such a significant reason.”
“I am afraid, you know.”
“The truth is…”

“Me?”
“No—it’s not about you being you, but…”
“Me being like this with you…?”

“No, rather—it’s my own problem. Sooner or later, I’ll become completely immobilized.”

“And what’s so terrible about that?”

“Before long, I might start making all sorts of demands on you.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“I will become unable to live without you.”

Woman: "What’s wrong with that?"

Man: (As if to himself) "What’s wrong with that..."
(Pause) "What’s wrong with that…"
(Pause) "It’s not good at all."

A long silence.

Woman: (Abruptly) "The lighthouse light came on."

Man: "It must be time to go."

"I suppose so."
They began to move...

(Pause) Well, this is goodbye then.

Man: How about it—would that be better?

Woman: “Well, as for me, either way…” (Pause) “By the way, discussing something like this while putting on such serious airs—we’re quite the fools, aren’t we? Why don’t we each just do as we like? If you want to leave, then go ahead. I’ll stay like this a little longer.”

Man: “Aren’t you hungry?”

Woman: “You don’t have to worry about other people.”

Man: …….

Woman: “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I detest indecisive men….”

Man: “Whether I resolve myself or not—this isn’t a situation that particularly requires deciding right now, is it?”

Woman: (Bursting out laughing) This is exactly the kind of situation that requires a decision.

Man: "Is that so? Then I shall make a decision."
(Attempting to stand) "Goodbye."

Woman: (Deliberately turns away, pretending not to hear)

Man: "Goodbye, and fare you well."
(Rises)

Woman: (Suddenly grabs the man’s hand and pulls him back down beside her) "Don’t!"

Man: …………?

Woman: "No, you can’t go…."

Man: "Please, let me go."

Woman: (Gazing into the man's eyes) "You're a coward, aren’t you."

Man: (with exaggerated seriousness) "Please forgive me."

Woman: (laughing as if nothing happened) "I'll forgive you, so come sit here again."

Man (reluctantly sits down)

Woman: (still holding the man’s hand, accusatory) “Why…?”

Man: (bows his head in shame)

Woman: “Why try to run? What frightens you? Who gets hurt?”
(Pause) “Tell me that…?”

Man: (meeting her gaze) “You’re rather good at this act yourself.”
(His mouth twitches toward laughter but hardens mid-motion.)

“If you’re going to say such things, then let’s discuss this transactionally.”
“Well, then that should suffice.”

“That’s not what I meant.”
“I think it would be better if we didn’t raise any more issues about us.”
“As I stated earlier, we should maintain a strictly platonic relationship.”
“I believed this possible with you.”
“At present, I wish to form no relationships beyond friendship with any woman.”
“To explain why would take time—in brief, I’ve lost all interest in what’s called romance.”
“No—that phrasing creates misunderstanding.”
“To clarify—I find myself unable to endure the inevitable complications arising from such entanglements.”

Woman: “So it’s just too much trouble, then.”

Man: “It’s simply too much of a hassle.”

Woman: “It’s not that you’re being creepy, is it?”

The man was thoroughly weary.

Woman: “You’ve never known its true flavor.”
“Why do you laugh?”
“I wonder if it seems strange for me to say such things…”
“It might only seem strange to you.”

Man: (feigning ignorance) “If there were even one thing in this world that seemed strange only to me, wouldn’t that be splendid?”

Woman: (as if narrating a story) That’s right—you may swell with pride all you like, for you’re being loved by a woman staking her very life on it.

Man: That love—I’m fighting to reject with my own life.

Woman: Empty bravado—were you to glimpse this love’s true nature, you’d snatch that precious life straight back into your breast pocket.

Man: (playfully) “No, no.”

Woman: “What do you mean, ‘No, no’? Now, listen closely and hear the song I sing.”

Man: “Before that, I’ll just go grab a bite to eat.”

“You can’t.”
“If you dislike the song, let’s make it a story.”
“First and foremost, we shall make no vows.”
“Instead, we shall go to a place where no one exists and build a love nest for just the two of us.”
“We shall arrange not to meet face-to-face from dawn until dusk.”

“During that time, I shall make as lonely a face as possible.”
“Because you might come to see what I’m doing at any hour, any moment…”
“And then, the fact that I’m making such a lonely face all by myself must be your greatest happiness…”

“That’s not true.”

“But that’s not true at all…
Then I shall always make a cheerful face.
I shall make the same radiant face whether being held in your arms or not.
You may summon me at any time.
However, I shall arrange it so I cannot approach you without your permission.
A woman can’t restrain herself unless she goes that far…”

The man…………….

“What kind of work shall we do…? You’re still writing fairy tales, aren’t you. I’ll do whatever you like. Shall we grow flowers? Shall we raise chickens?”

“Let’s go with chickens then.”

“Right—chickens it is. Shall we limit ourselves to just the kitchen and sewing? And the laundry…”

“But don’t we have a maid?”

“That maid—it’s better if she isn’t here.”

The man…………….

Woman: “Or if you dislike making me do such things, let’s hire a young maid instead.”

“Thirteen to fifteen years old... innocent, does as she’s told...”
“I’ll train her well.”

“Oh my, if I say such things, it’s exactly like I’m becoming your wife.”

Then came the matter of what to do when the two of them were together...

A long silence.

“What are you thinking so hard about?”

“I was terribly disappointed,” said the man. “Because I realized that when you’re dreaming such dreams, you remain an ordinary woman after all. To be sure—hearing that sort of song from the lips of a young beauty like yourself, taken simply as it comes—isn’t entirely unpleasant. In fact, despite my years, it even brought a lump to my throat. But a lullaby remains a lullaby. I no longer drift peacefully off to sleep over such things.”

“Anyone—man or woman—becomes ordinary when they’re serious.”

The man…………….

"You're not your usual self today either."
"Don't you think so? But I'm glad."
"Because I made you a bit somber…"

The man…………….

“Once I said what I wanted to say, my chest felt lighter. (Pause) But please don’t think badly of me…”

“I don’t think anything of it.”
(Pause) But where does sincerity end and jest begin…

“Of course.”
“It’s not like I can’t dismiss this as acting.”

“That way should make it easier to get up,” said the man. “Now—let’s return to being our former selves and say goodbye as we always do.”

Woman: (Weakly, yet imitating his tone) “Very well.”

(Pause) But it was already pitch black.
"Escort me to the hotel, if you would."
"While you're at it, why don't we have dinner together?"
"(Pause) If you'd like—you could stay at my place."
"There are plenty of rooms available."

Man: “Well then，I'll see you home regardless.”
“That road isn't safe to walk alone.”
(Rises.)

Woman: “Oh，there's nothing fearsome about it.”
“Only that one might lose their way.”
“Even at noon，careless steps lead astray in that cedar grove.” (Rises) “Perilous indeed.”
(Staggering as she slings an arm about his shoulder) “Can't have that.”
“Why such haste...”
(Detaining him) “Here now—what manner of face is this?”
(Peering up at him) “Come now—smile.”
(The instant she spoke，her lips met his cheek.)

Man: “What do you think you’re doing?”
(Startled even as he spoke, he shoved the woman away and fled like a man running for his life.)

Woman: (Laughing) “It was just an act! All of that was an act…”
“Where are you going…?”
“I told you I won’t do it again….”
“I’m truly done now…”

There was a long silence.

Woman: (Suddenly raises her voice and laughs, then chases after the man.)

Act II

On the same sand dune

Morning.

The Man was sitting side by side with Another Man, facing forward, legs stretched out.

“However, there’s someone who saw the two of you here last night.”

Man: "That doesn't constitute any evidence, does it?"

Another Man: "So that doesn't constitute any evidence, eh? In that case, even if I tell you the rest—you won't be surprised?"

"I won’t be surprised."

Another Man: “She was crying here until midnight.”
“All alone…”

He remained silent…

Another Man: “I was the one who saw her crying.”

He must have been somewhat surprised—but should he proceed with what came next?
“There are things that will surprise you more.”

Man: ……

Another Man: "She is with me now."
"Been in my room since last night."

Man: "Since last night?"

“Still not surprised?”
“Then I’ll say my last word.”
“We’ve married.”

Man: “Huh?”

Another Man: “Of course.”
“I didn’t come all this way just to see your surprised face.”
“I simply came to clarify my position.”

The man remained silent…….

"You should've known long ago that I was infatuated with her."
"Probably not a soul at this resort remains unaware of it."
"The rumor about me gathering every watermelon seed she's eaten—that's not entirely false either."

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “But that’s precisely the sort of woman she is.”
“I didn’t know until last night either, but apparently she’d made it a policy to immediately cut ties with any man who declared his love to her.”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: "I was one of them too."

Man: ………….

Another Man: “It wasn’t just me.”
“Apparently ‘Wildcat’ was the same. ‘D’Annunzio’ was the same.”
“‘Green Loincloth’ was the same.”
“And then ‘Shelf-Butt’…”

Man: “Shelf-Butt…?”

Another Man: “You don’t know him? That guy—a teacher at a girls’ school or something—who walks with his butt sticking out… Renting a hermitage at Kōmyō-ji and living there alone…”

Man: “Ah.”

Another Man: “‘Shelf-Butt’… This one got dismissed once then tried again and failed.”

Man: “That guy…?”

“There may be others still, but well—that’s neither here nor there. For this past week because of that, I haven’t spoken to her.”
“Just a stray dog chased from the kitchen.”
“I thought staying in this place wouldn’t do.”
“So last night—gathering memories here and there under good moonlight—I walked along the shore all the way here.”

(Pause) When he looked, there was a woman alone, pressing a handkerchief to her eyes and sobbing. Suppressing his pounding heart, he approached her side.
(Pause) "What's wrong... at this hour?" he said—and everything was fine until he crouched down beside her.
That, unexpectedly, was her.

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “If it were her we’re dealing with, the matter would actually resolve more easily.”
“See? Isn’t that right? Sure enough, everything went smoothly.”

Man: ………….

“When I mention Another Man, you must be making that face.”
“Wait.”
“There are complicated circumstances behind this.”
“Her account goes like this.”
“It seems she had secretly been drawn to you.”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: "However, she feared you would see through her feelings."
"Or rather, she feared you would preempt her."
"Because she knew she lacked the courage to coldly dismiss your confession—well, that's her version of events, anyway."
"Therefore, she had to break her own self-imposed rule."
"But her self-esteem wouldn't allow that."

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “So, she devised a strategy.”
“In other words, her strategy was this: to throw herself into your arms in order to escape them.”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “Don’t you get it?”
(Pause) “To put it simply, she figured that if she made the first move, you’d be the one to run away.”
(Pause) “And sure enough, you fled.”
“And that’s what she said.”
(Pause)

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “Is that really true, you…?”
“You’re a strange man, though.”
“It may sound ironic coming from me, but you still ran away.”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “You really don’t have feelings for that woman, do you?”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “If my wording was poor, shall I rephrase it?”
“Do you truly not care what happens to that woman?”
“I came specifically to ask you this.”
“From my perspective, posing this question isn’t so unnatural.”
“Therefore I’ll ask plainly—you’ve no intention of reclaiming her from my grasp, have you?”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “What—even if I said that, it doesn’t matter.”
“That woman will become exactly as you wish, depending on how you approach her.”
“That she happened to come flying into my bosom—there’s nothing strange about that.”
“My bosom is her hospital.”
(Pause) “She’s a kind of patient.”

The man remained silent…….
“She became mine last night, but she absolutely forbids uttering the word ‘Luv.’”
(Pause) “She went through the playing cards on my desk one by one, tearing up every heart-suited card she found.”
“It’s sheer madness.”

Man: ………….

Another Man: “If I call it madness—well, she said she wants a photo of yours.”
“I don’t know what she’ll do with it, but if you have one, give it to her.”
“Even if she uses that photo as a protective charm against her skin, I won’t raise any objections.”

The man remained silent…….

“You must think me a fool.”
“But I thank you.”
“A fortunate man like you could never understand a wretched man’s feelings.”
“I’ll take her and retreat to the countryside.”
“She desires that herself.”
“Though who knows how long it’ll last.”
“If she—accustomed to glamour—starts yearning for city lights again, we’ll face that when it comes.”
“If I become useless as a man, we’ll face that too when it comes.”
“But this tomorrow that’s practically today—I won’t have her snatched away by other men’s hands.”
“That’s why I came for one word of your answer.”

The man remained silent—

Another Man: “Are you truly unaffected?”

Man: (Flatly) “Not at all.”

Another Man: “Is that so?”

Man: “You said your bosom is her hospital—and with that, you think she came seeking your bosom solely for that reason? About that matter—you haven’t considered a more thorough way of thinking, have you?”

Another Man: “What do you mean by a ‘thorough way of thinking’…?”

Man: “Don’t you think that in the end, she loves you?”

“That can be interpreted any number of ways.”
“Or, to delve deeper—to borrow your words—for example, she might be trying to love you through me.”

The man remained silent…….

Another Man: “Or perhaps by doing so, she’s barely managing to soothe her self-esteem.”

Man: “So you’re completely unaffected?”

Another Man remained silent…….

Man: “There’s no need for me to ask you this—but for my part, I find it extremely interesting to know you came to me with that story after having thought things through so thoroughly.”

“Anyway—I swear to you—between me and her, there will never be ‘anything.’”

Another Man: “Well then, I’ve nothing more to say.”
“Though we’d scarcely had chances to speak before, it’s fortunate we’ve somehow come to talk this frankly.”
“The fact that when you speak of me to others, you don’t call me ‘the prodigal son of a major taxpayer,’ but instead say ‘a man who attended university lectures with you’—that, in its own way, was one reason I felt a sense of closeness to you.”

Man: “I didn’t know you were something like the prodigal son of a major taxpayer.”

“I see—so we were that indifferent to each other.”
“Now that you mention it, even this time, it was through that woman that we ended up talking to each other.”

“You said you remembered me, didn’t you?”

“I remembered.
“You wore the same clothes in summer and winter.
“You often left your seat during lectures.
“You had a female audit student as a friend.”

“That’s my sister.”
“I see, you remember well.”
“And then—do you know that I once collapsed from cerebral anemia during psychology class?”

“I don’t know.”
“I can say I don’t know anything that’s only happened once.”

A long silence.

Man: “Do you believe everything she said?”

Another Man: “I don’t believe everything. As a rule, I’ve decided to only believe half of what women say. Though one can’t systematically determine what to believe and what not to believe—such things don’t really matter. Generally, if you make haphazard judgments—‘this is true,’ ‘this is a lie’—you won’t be too badly deceived.”

Man: “Even if you’re deceived, it’s only half.”

Another Man: “That’s right—only half.”

Man: “Then why not go a step further and not believe any of it at all? The rate of being deceived would be even lower.”

“That’s too low,” said the other man. “But never being deceived at all would be far too lonely. If I were you, I’d let her deceive me once.”

The man remained silent.

“I don’t know whether she actually tried to deceive you,” continued the other man, “but isn’t it interesting to consider it that way? In other words—it would mean she doesn’t love you.”

“Well… what I meant to say was—”

“I see.” The other man cut him off. “Following that logic, last night’s performance takes on a different perspective.”

“That approach would prove more amusing for you yourself.”

“Not really.”
“It must be easier for you that way too.”
“A matter of feelings.”
“It ill suits someone as perceptive as you.”
“Making her cry...”
“That must gall her pride too.”
“You’ve neatly outmaneuvered her little performance.”
“Were I in your place, I’d have played her toy awhile longer.”
“Rather than fleeing from the outset, I’d have taken your suplex cleanly.”
“Then gone ‘Ha ha ha!’ laughing in your face.”
“What say you—never saw that coming?”

Man: (with a bitter smile) “As we’ve been talking like this, I’ve gradually come to understand various things.”
“However, I still lack that courage.”
“That too is a form of playing with fire.”

Another Man: “Playing with fire, huh... That might just be your self-conceit.”
“I’ll head back and question her properly.”
“Well then, I’ll take my leave.”
(Stands up) “You’ll return here next year too, won’t you?”
“We’ll likely come as well.”
“Now then—do give that swimming your best effort.”

(Exits)

Man: (Silently watches his retreating figure.)
(Eventually lies prone, faces the open sea, and recites in a low voice)

In the depths of the waves

A voice calls out.

(Then, following this song, from afar, a woman's voice:)

Were I not here,

Who would answer?

Man: (Fearfully raises his upper body and listens intently to this voice.)

In that moment—curtain—